Daily Stories, Personals

Jinxed, jinxed again!

I once wrote, “I’m getting there, but I’m not pretty sure how I did.”

Now I’m here, I am held back.

A constant struggle between letting you go or making you stay haunts me.

If I don’t distance myself away from you, it will be as if I’m killing myself every single day.

If I let you go, I guess, it will be a true manifestation of love, one that is not self-centered.

Frustrating, I know.

All my life, I have loved really, really hard, looking for some place where my restless heart can rest.

“But you’re so young,” they said. Young to be hurt this much? Young to love this much?

Loving is timeless, and the youth they’ve been referring to has been rid off of me.

Why choose to love now? Why choose the ‘meantime’ kind of love when you can wait for the best?

I believe that there’s no such thing as a ready-made best.

I believe that everything is a work in progress.

And love, for the matter, is, too.

I’ve seen you deprived of the love you have always longed for, the love you really deserved.

Now that you’ve found it, I think I should just be happy, and let things flow as normal as they used to.

The longing remains, yes, but I have better things to do than hurt myself in a constant, agonizing cycle of running back and turning away from you.

It’s been a year since I told myself that I’ve somewhat ‘recovered’ from falling in love so hard with someone who didn’t take me seriously.

I didn’t expect that after recovery, I’d be tangled in a same situation (but with a better man) all over again.

I’ve been attached to you, your friends, your quirks, your pains.

I cannot afford to lose anyone at the expense of anything.

But a thing such as ‘fairness’ exists, and that entails me to accept that I’d have to lose something at the expense of something.

But ironically, it’s not fair at all.

In the process, I lost you (perhaps to another woman, one who’s better, as always, as I am an ever-insufficient kind).

I could lose your friends, persons I held so dear, persons whose company I will constantly long for.

When I knew of this, I didn’t really know what to say or feel. I didn’t cry happy or sad tears even though I push myself to do so.

God knows that he has given everything I asked for, and I thank Him for letting me win at life at some sort.

But, due to fairness, I cannot win everything. And as I’ve said, I lost a prize, the coveted prize that is to be with you.

To be able to say all these things is strenuous, as I find it really hard to put my feelings into words.

It is also evident that it lacks cohesion, as I cannot really pull myself together at the moment.

These words are not enough, when will they ever be?

At least I tried. Feeling this, writing this, and loving you. It was a great experience.

Do know that once I’ve adjusted, I will slowly drift away from you, so as not to let my feelings get in the way with our already ‘jinxed’ friendship.

I don’t want to shut you out and push you away, just as I did to countless other people for some reasons only I can understand.

There is a fine line between everything, and I’ll try balancing my act from there.

Do know that even with this, I’ll still be around just in case you’ll need me. I’m still your friend, just sans the feelings.

I still hold on to the promise of the future, a future where we are free of all these chains, of all these excess things we didn’t sign up for.

Our paths will cross again, not now, but probably. Maybe by that time we can work things out, and I promise you I will be sufficient this time.

For know though, I would have to say goodbye. Goodbye to all those emotions that messed all things up.

I’ll be leaving you with this.

What we could’ve had wasn’t supposed to be jinxed like this.

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Daily Stories

2014’s Last and 2015’s First

Hi y’all!

Cheers to a brand new year!!

2014 has been a challenging yet a very rewarding year for me, and if not for most of us. I sincerely hope that 2015 will open more doors in our lives, and will have us enter more rooms to become even better versions of ourselves.

As for my first year in blogging, I know that there is a lot to improve (trust me, I’m working on it) and I really hope that I can share more stories and more adventures with you guys this year.

From the looks of it, January 2015 will be a jam-packed month. The Holy Father will be visiting the country in two weeks’ time and I pray that his visit will help everyone of us as we wade through this year. Another thing is, my 2nd semester in school starts in 3 days (!!!) and I promised myself to work harder so that the benefits I’ll reap from doing great in my endeavors will be seriously rewarding.

Let’s make our hopes our goals. This is a brand new start.

xo,

Marla 🙂

Daily Stories, Personals

Hiatus

Hi!

I know it’s been a while since my last post, but I would like to let you guys know that I’ve been up to several things lately. As you all know, my five-month vacation has finally come to an end, and sophomore year fully-immersed in the Journalism program is kinda hectic. I need to bounce back from the mediocre performance I had back in Freshman year [I totally regret that] and I would like to get back on track acads-wise. Don’t worry though, because I have many things lined up to share with you guys and I hope that you all appreciate it. School may bother me in so many ways that I am not able to focus on my blogging, but I promise [How many times have I promised?] that I’ll try my best to be as well-rounded as possible. If given the luxury of time tonight or soon, hopefully I can share with you snippets of what I’ve been up to lately of which are all amazing experiences. I’ll keep you guys posted and I hope you’ll continue to support my blog and tolerate my thoughts and quirks!

‘Til the next!

xx,

Marla 🙂

Daily Stories, Personals

My Life, Lately [Part 2]

I knew I had to work on the Part 2 to get on the hype of having been able to publish the first one.

So here it is!

Korean Wave

The last time I went gaga over K-dramas [well, Asian dramas, generally] was way back in high school. The feeling of immersing oneself in an Asian romantic comedy series is really overwhelming, and that feeling has occurred to me once again. At the moment, I can’t stop gushing over Kim Soo Hyun (he’s starred at the series Moon Embracing The Sun and Dream High, as well as the movies Secretly, Greatly and The Thieves). I saw his great acting skills at the recently aired on local TV K-drama “My Love from The Stars” [originally “You Who Came from The Stars” in SBS Korea], and he portrays a 404 year-old alien Do Min Joon who falls in love with the biggest hallyu star of the present, Cheon Song Yi [played by Gianna Jun, previously seen on My Sassy Girl and Windstruck]. Their chemistry is really great, the way they look together is really great and their undeniably great acting skills are just the icing on the cake. I really, really ship them [but how I wish I was Cheon Song Yi]. After stalking Kim Soo Hyun for quite some time now, I’ve heard and read a lot about him, and unlike other young actors that have been making it big on the hallyu scene, he’s a standout. Recently, he’s donated a huge sum of money and tons of rice to donate to children in China, and he used to play badminton with his neighborhood’s elders when he has spare time on weekends. How cool is that? Anyways, I hoarded some snapshots of him, but here’s the one I like most, courtesy of Grazia/ Google Images.

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I even got Soo Hyun all over my desktop background!

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The Korean Wave I’m having at the moment doesn’t stop there.

Korean movies are the bomb! They have interesting plots [and plot twists] that would definitely get you at the edge of your seat. Most are tearjerkers and some are really inspiring stories,  and it will really make you appreciate the Korean values embedded in all of its scenes. I’ve watched My Sassy Girl (2001) [which had a Hollywood remake in 2008], Windstruck (2004), Miracle in Cell No. 7 (2013) [It’ll get all the feels inside of you and can consume you for days] and 200 Pound Beauty (2006). What I like most was 200 Pounds Beauty, because it is the story of a girl completely hidden behind the shadows of a top, sexy singer that uses her voice onstage. She struggles to find love and acceptance from people around her as well as the love of her life, and eventually, she resorted to the extremes to do such thing. I’ve got a screen grab from the movie, in which the lines are actually usable in my day to day life.

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Loomband Mania 

At first I thought this new kiddie craze will frustrate the shit out of me, turns out, it got me hooked!

It took me 5 small children, all of which are my little cousins, to teach me how to make my first loomband bracelet, and guess what, they educated me about this thing very well. At the moment I’ve hoarded looms of different colors and I’ve started making different charms, as I devotedly follow the step-by-step instructions of Made by Mommy on YouTube, which makes my loombanding experience a whole lot easier.

Some of the charms I made [using just my crochet hook]:

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(From left to right: Butterfly, Lollipop, Snowflake [inspired by Frozen], Infinity Symbol, Butterfly, Breast Cancer Advocacy Ribbon, Gingerbread Man, Four-Leaf Clover and Miniature Cross)

Great People and Great Times

Well, just recently, I’ve caught up with my high school homies that I haven’t seen for quite a long time! College has been very hectic for all of us and catching up was an impossible thing to do. Luckily, fate has given us the chance to meet up and spend time with each other. These guys have been with me through thick and thin, and I am really glad to still have them in my life. Growing up alone isn’t really a smooth ride, but having friends — people that actually know you inside and out definitely made that tough ride really enjoyable.

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Just last Saturday, 14th of June, one of my best friends, Precious (the girl at the right most part of the photo above) celebrated her 18th birthday. Of course, this was another chance to catch up with some of my friends and the best part was we were all dressed up for the event! [Because you rarely see your friends transform from their normal selves to their best-dressed-selves, and for me that’s a big deal, so yeah]

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Summer vacation has bummed the sh*t out of me, and honestly, it sucks to not spend time with people you feel really happy with. On top of that, being free from all of life’s extra concerns is a must for every person, no matter how serious you are with whatever it is that you’re doing. Of course, I am really glad to be able to spend some time with my best pal from college. From spontaneous lunches at quite-fancy restaurants to chill-at-home hangouts, no time is wasted when we’re together, and it was really a breath of fresh air to watch The Fault In Our Stars with her [because your best bud will not judge you if you look ugly whilst you sob heavily because of a sick love story].

10259723_843801488969008_1054388945978286763_n Photo on 5-21-14 at 6.29 PM #3 Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 3.40.43 PM Maybe there’s still room for Part 3. I wouldn’t want this post to be too lengthy. [See what I did there?]

On to the next one!

xx,

Marla 🙂

Daily Stories, Personals

My Life, Lately [Part 1]

A two to three week long blogging hiatus never hurt nobody.

There’s been a lot going on in my life, thanks to the 4 month-long summer vacation that has given me all the time in the world. I don’t know where to start, really. I’ve been trying to get my shit together as I’m on my way to being a full-fledged adult. Well, things have been kinda crazy too. Hopefully this blog post looks as planned out as it is.

#GettingMyShitTogether

Reflections I’ve made as I waded through daily life has enabled me to list down things I want to accomplish/improve/work on before I turn 18 this October. I don’t know if this is being mature or not but I want things to be planned out, and turning 18 definitely kick starts the need to do such thing. Without further due, here’s my official “Pre-18 Bucket List” or what I fondly call as my #GettingMyShitTogether List.

(Those with ** are already accomplished; * are works-in-progress)

1. Have the following Government ID’s

[No more time for Fake ID’s and juvenile delinquency, who doesn’t like a girl with legit identification cards?]

**> Tax Identification Number ID

** > A Non-Professional Driver’s License

> Voter’s ID

> Passport [I want to travel the world. Who says I can’t #ThinkBig? With dreams, size does matter.]

2. Learn new things! [Disclaimer: I am not/sort of/ kinda doing this for men. You choose.]

> How to control my bike gear [It’s like a bike’s stick shift, according to trail terrain and steepness]

> Learn to operate a motorcycle [Men can’t resist girls that have a way with wheels.]

> Learn how to drive ** [Men can’t resist girls with the love of speed.]

> Re-learn skateboarding. [Men can’t resist girls that can do extreme sh*t.]

> Learn a new language. [Preferably French or Korean. More of my Korean madness on Part 2]

3. Be more responsible!

> Practice waking up early * [I am currently waking up early to view Korean TV Shows and attend my Aero classes]

> Go to bed early [This is a bit impossible, even if I’ll regret it the next morning.]

> Be more hands-on to my dog, Princess [Can’t, because she’s always bitching at me]

5. Increase productivity!

> Write stories [Haven’t mustered enough guts to write a short fan fiction, yet.]

> Blog some more [Kill me now.]

> Be hands-on with publication tasks * [You should work for what you love, and with the help of this, I’m actually doing so!]

6. LOSE SOME WEIGHT!

> Control eating. * [As I’ve tweeted earlier: “Can’t curb my cravings, because knowing that there’s leftover pizza in the fridge can ruin one’s diet”]

> Drink more water. *

> Detox more * [ Senna laxatives, coffee and fruit infused water actually helps.]

7. Rekindle old friendships. [More of it on next blog posts]

8. Make new ones! [Girls gotta have her new homies!]

9. Travel more [If I can, but because I’m financially incapacitated at the moment, there’ll be a time for that.]

10. Be more confident. [Weight issues. More of it on next blog posts.]

11. Target Shooting with Dad. [Girl’s gotta have a way with ’em guns.]

12. SAVE MORE MONEY!

> Make Money [What will you save if you don’t have one?]

> Buy some stuff for myself [Save and make money first.]

> Save up and be financially responsible. [I would need divine intervention for this.]

> Enter a business venture *  [ Follow @baghaulph on IG!]

More of My Life, Lately soon. On to the next one!

xx,

Marla 🙂 

Daily Stories

Holiday Rush

 

So here it goes…

The 1st of December is the municipality day [who cares], and both my late Lola’s and my Tita’s birthday. Since dad’s birthday came in days before, it was celebrated simultaneously with the day’s festivities in our tiny but happy household. It was really great spending time with my cousins, eating good home-cook cuisine my family can boast of, and just let the good times roll. I am thankful to be the family’s last “apo” [grandchild] because even though I am an only child, my cousins serve as my siblings and they tend to spoil me too [because I am the only one left studying, all of them are already working]!

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Fast forward to another week, I finally met the meme that makes me really, really happy. One day while I was staging our reading theatre performance, I noticed that there was this guy wearing this “Doge” mask and holds signs like “much christmas”, “nice doge” while sitting at one of the benches near to where we’re practicing. When I approached him to ask for a photo, he didn’t utter a single word, he just nodded when I posed here and there to get a photo op with him.  He’s really making people happy and at the same time, astounded and curious. Here’s a snapshot:

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“much christmas, nice doge, such wow~~~”

Fast forward once again to another week as Christmas is fast approaching and my Dad finally decided to buy Macy. In case you’re wondering who Macy is, it isn’t a dog, or a bike, or whatsoever thing I give names to. It’s a 13″ MacBook Pro, which he intended to purchase for me when I turn 18 next year. But since my dad can’t handle the awesomeness of this mean machine, he decided to buy it right away and have me look forward to what he’s up to for my [also fast approaching] 18th birthday. He thought of the need to invest on stuff like these in order to help me achieve greater productivity, as well as to aide me through the course of my career as a journalist [or as an educator] in the near future. I still have to study Macy’s technological prowess, since she has other greater functions that are still alien to me, and I need mentoring just in case she eats me alive out of being dumbfounded.

Since this season is also the time to do excessive shopping not for oneself but for other people you hold dear [or maybe even not], I have been limiting my food intake in order to meet the budget I had to have in order to buy gifts for my closest friends and family. Top that off with Christmas parties here and there, mall-wide, store-wide or nationwide sales and thrift markets in all areas of the approximate metropolis, and many other expenses incurred in line of the spirit of Christmas. I have shopped for books to give to loved ones, clothes and other novelty stuff that I find reasonable, functional and significant among many others. But the happiest part of this shopping experience are the memories you share with the people you do Christmas shopping with. Another thing is the publication’s Christmas party. There were definitely good food, good laughter and good companions [not just co-workers] in The Flame. I am glad that I made the right choice of applying and eventually working for them. Here are some of my Christmas shopping and party snapshots:

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To add to the Holiday Rush, well, spending time with people you love or care for the most are one of the best things in life [that are for free]. I happened to come across this Dutch word, “Gezellig”, translated as convivial, cozy, fun, quaint, or nice atmosphere, but can also connote belonging, time spent with loved ones, the fact of seeing a friend after a long absence, or general togetherness (from Wikipedia). With this, after almost more than two months of not seeing each other [and not talking to him,actually], I met up and hung out with one of my best[est] guy friends, Arv. Well, we’ve been friends for like 4 years, so we pretty much know each other very well. He’s pretty attractive, though [as what everyone says of him] and he’s really fun to be with [no wonder why lots of girls fancy him]. So, yes, basically it is really hard to describe him without sounding like I’m fangirling, so that’s it.  It was “Gezellig”, at its finest. I missed hanging out this weird kid so much. Here’s an outtake I personally liked the most:

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Furthermore…..

I didn’t attend the Paskuhan of my beloved alma mater because I was lazy as f*** and I don’t want to experience too much hassle. So I just rested and prepared for the trip my family was set to do the day after. Going to my maternal grandparents’ house in Pampanga is so good. Good in the sense that there’s good food and good times and new nieces and nephews every once in a while to cheer up the place a little bit. Here are some really cute and adorable photos of my nephew and niece!

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Sunday, the day after our Pampanga trip, was yet another family day. After we went to church, my dad decided to take me and my mum to the Quezon Memorial Circle in Quezon City, which also happens to be a Christmas hotspot here in the Metro. I was really surprised to see lots of kids having fun, friends and family hanging out with each other, thrift shops here and there and different food shacks that is definitely a gastronomic paradise. The story behind this family date is that 17 years ago, Daddy and Mommy planned to date there, but unfortunately they ended up in the Ninoy Aquino Parks and Wildlife Park just a few blocks away. It was an epic fail but really memorable date for the both of them, and after marriage and with a full grown baby-girl [which is me] they decided to revisit the place, and bring back old memories. Well, as we were strolling through the entirety of the circular park, famous for the 60 foot-tall [am I right?] memorial monument of the 1st President of the Philippine Commonwealth, Manuel L. Quezon. Well, here are quite a few photos [I’ve chosen the best ones!] from our Sunday family bonding:

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The Quezon Memorial Shrine, under renovation.

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The tomb of former President Manuel L. Quezon

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The carnival inside the Quezon City Circle 

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#ootd : Top from Paperdolls and Co., Denim Pants from Forever 21 , Shoes from Shoebox, vintage bag from Esprit 

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This tattoo shack caught my eye because of it’s catchy name which resounded a Filipino bad word [I often use, lol!]  

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I scream for Ice Cream!  

Well, these are just some of the great things that has happened to me before the onset of Christmas day. I know that “the true essence of Christmas” is too cliche already, but, I think that Christmas is Christmas if, as Joseph Gordon-Levitt said, “It’s not much about what you do, it’s who you do it with.” If we really cherish these moments that can only happen at least once a year with our treasured loved ones, may they be near or far, Christmas will not be just a season to splurge but a season to remember and continually commemorate with joy and LOVE. Merry Christmas!

P.S; As a virtual gift, you can comment and/or promote my blog so that we can interact and collaborate!

On to the next one! xx 

(various photos were taken with a Nikon D3200, iPhone 3GS and iPhone 5, and post-processed with VSCOCam App for iOS)

Daily Stories, Personals

November And Everything Else In Between

Hi!! Finally, I have enough drive/push/motivation/endorphins to write about my November. Lots of stuff have happened, and all I have posted were sad, melancholic and often emotional posts. But not all times the past month has been bad to me. It has its own set of ups too! With this, I hope my memory serves me right.

Disclaimer:

  • Chronology of events are unreliable [because of attention span problems]
  • Pictures are not really “blogger-like” ; cut me some slack, I am no photographer [but I’ll try to become one, given the chance]
  • I will just provide you rundowns to make this post more readable and reader-friendly [because those are two different things]
  • And if you don’t really care about what you’re seeing, still read on further. Comment for candy [hahaha!]
  • I’ll still try my best to make this post enjoyable too, though.

Alright then!

1st Week of November:

Onset of the Second Semester. New professors, same block mates, new deadlines to meet. Practically stressful, but I made sure I had fun in more ways than one [when I have time to spare or waste].

I started drawing and posting my very own, handcrafted “T.A.E (Tantalizing Adventures of Everyone) Comics” here in my blog. And maybe you guys have seen it, so who cares, right?

And…. nothing much to share except for this really cute panorama photo of our classroom setting. Image

November 8, though, was a dreadful day for the Filipino people and for the world watching the news as it unfolds. Super Typhoon Yolanda struck certain parts of Visayas, and it has left widespread devastation of property and loss of numerous lives. It will take years from the people victimized by Yolanda to recover from the tragedy, but as what I’ve said in my #YolandaPH post, we have an “Unwavering Filipino Resiliency”. I just hope, pray and wish that the Yolanda survivors have a great Christmas, just as much as I do, despite all that has happened to them.

2nd Week of November:

[Thank God for Facebook, I have a timeline of all the stuff I’ve done that has a photo taken with it and I’ll be able to provide enough good stuff here.]

Being the NBSB (No-Boyfriend-Since-Birth) young lady that I am, my best friend, the ever fabulous Xave Gregorio (follow him on: http://theplumtimes.wordpress.com), made a Bitstrip “thingy” [because I don’t know what to call it] and it turned out to look like this:

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Previously [way before I started my blog], on my birthday celebration with my closest friends, he [Xave] wished that my love life will not be as barren as it is now that I am 17 years old. He has full knowledge that I haven’t had a significant other ever in my life [yet!]. Causal of this Bitstrip being produced and publicized. Nothing wrong with it, though. This is how me and my friends love each other.

It was pretty much a week full of fun and surprises [and stress, of course]. I can remember posting “Worth The Weight” [the post closest to my heart so far] and just two days after, Dad surprised me with a new [secondhand] phone!!! Hurray!

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Since I now work for my college’s publication, The Flame [which is so dear to me], we had this very spontaneous, fun and food-filled General Assembly! We had different deadlines to meet for different outputs expected of our workforce, but we sure know how to balance work and play. Here is my favorite [and collaged] outtake of the event: Image

(Photo Collage Made & Owned by Ms. Isabella Cuartero, one of my dear Ates at The Flame)

Right after the G.A, I had my awesome and very “exploitable” [did I use the right word when all I mean is that I can maximize its use in more ways than one] Press I.D!!!!!

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3rd Week of November:

A week filled with J.Co donuts and other #foodporns, fangirling and many other stuff school and work-related. I posted pictures of the sumptuous varieties of donuts and other food I’ve been eating [because pigging-out is so blog-worthy] and here are some photos that will surely make you crave:

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“Nothing is sweeter than the togetherness we share.”

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#foodporn photos edited with VSCOCam app for iOS devices.

When the fangirling kicks in…..

Being a freshman student in a big university that participates in inter-university sports events with raging hormones for a hot and definitely a force-to-be-reckoned-with athlete of the very famous branch of the school pride, I gathered all my guts to have a picture taken with my idol Tiger, Kevin Ferrer. He caught my attention when he started sticking his tongue out so much [way better than how Miley does]  on consecutive heated games against DLSU for the championship title, and when he makes really awesome efforts for the team. So, I cannot elaborate much, but I just felt really happy to have a picture with him. He got me starstruck!

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Since my best friends are some of the persons I hold so dear, we actually try to be with and for each other in every step of the way. May it be for moral support, relationship issues, and many other stuff [including getting freebies at different event booths in school], we make sure we are there for each other. Being so, my bestie Sam was a Social Media Correspondent for the USTv: Unang Dekada Kick-Off Party that happened last November 21. I was so proud of her!! Me and my other bestie Denise made sure we went to the event to support Sam [and look after her, in which she wore a skimpy but classical looking dress, which suited her very well] and to be able to get some freebies from the big media networks in the country [which can eventually be our workplace]. Here are some outtakes:

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Correct me if I’m wrong but the USTv: Unang Dekada Kick-Off Party was actually televised and was aired on national television! Way to go sister! 🙂

Working for a publication has its perks when you meet scholars and other professionals who are experts in their respective fields, and learn from them as you do your write-ups. Me and my co-writer met Prof. Xiao Chua, a really cool professor from the De La Salle University who has shed the light [he has given a clear explanation to certain historical accounts and interpretations] on our clouded belief on controversies enveloping the country’s history.  Here’s a snapshot we had with him:

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4th Week of November:

Probably one of the most stressful weeks topped off with deadlines to meet and attitudes [as well as moods] to endure. At the 27th, both my dad’s birthday as well as my article’s deadline, I was too spent to work when I got home. Too bad I failed to join in the merriment within our household. Meanwhile, the next day, the 28th was the big day for both me and my parents. It was our block’s first ever speech choir performance, partially handled by yours truly with my other very talented, creative and industrious block mates. Here is an outtake of a moment I’ve spent with my girl-friends [yes, they are my girl-friends] savouring the goodness of a job finally done.

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That same day, while I was far away in school all focused on the speech choir, my parents finally celebrated their 25 years in service for the company they work for. I am too proud of them, and I want to thank them at the same time for all the perseverance and hard work they shed in order to raise me and meet my needs. Here’s a snapshot of my favorite couple when they got home after the awarding ceremonies: 

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(styled by yours truly) 

Well, certainly, this post has summed up [almost] all of the happy stuff I’ve had this November. Everything else in between are all spontaneous moments that even though not recorded, will still cling to my memory every once in a while and when it comes in handy.  The onset of December [the legit Holiday rush] will give me more potential blog post-inspirations. Hopefully I can post them as soon as possible before they get all piled up and my memory won’t serve me right anymore. On to the next one. xx