Love and The “Feels”

I maybe writing this without the help of my spontaneous initial manuscript, but I know I can write about this fully just from my mind, which in fact, controls the heart. I really feel that it is too old and boring to start off with posing the question: “What is love?”, so by the power and freedom vested on me to write about my opinion, I will now proceed.

Love, yes, the whimsical, outright unfathomable and sometimes even crazy abstract thing that exists in our not-so-perfect world, filled with not-even-close-to-perfect people. Love, the feeling or emotion or inanimate idea that is given emphasis in connections, relationships and many other socially binding concepts. Love, the tool used by businesses to be able to sell different things with hearts, flowers, chocolates and everything nice as Valentines Day is fast approaching. Love— the thing that allegedly makes the world go round. So what about?

Love, like one’s existence is bounded and regulated by countless unwritten laws to live by. The entirety of one’s vocabulary, or even a dictionary itself is not —and is never enough to describe it perfectly. Just like everyone else, I believe that the Perfect Book [and I doubt you don’t know what it is] has summed love up. It has pointed out every inch of love that we’re all trying to decipher, and with this belief I strongly stand for. From it, I know love is really not a complicated thing, just being far-from-perfect human beings makes it like that.

Based on personal experience, I’ve not been involved in any kind of romantic and even erotic [not even close!] relationships. But I still know the feeling of being loved by God [despite arguments of His existence], my parents, relatives, friends and even animals. In instances wherein I feel like giving love, it was never mutual, which is a sad thing. Despite this, losing faith in love was never an option. I knew there is no other choice but to still cling to love even if it does not cling to you back. This makes life bearable and worth going through.

I’ve seen different people with different stories in different situations, all taken by storm by love. Stories of forgiveness, vengeance, success, sex, motivation, intervention, distances and breakthroughs participated by love. It gives me hope, hope that someday I’ll be able to experience any one of these kinds of stories, thus giving me the feeling so indescribable, netizens just decided to coin as the “Feels”.

From a personal standpoint, “feels” are driven by an insane feeling, pretty much from something you’ve either read, watched, written, done or have heard of. It makes your heart beat really fast, your mind go to imaginary places you’ve never been before creatively, and just changes the course of your day and makes you look forward to another one. The mere existence of such things gives love more exposure, increases its mileage, increases its level of possibility. Conclusively, both love and the “feels” can channel you hope.

As we live in a time when all things are deemed as difficult, where all things are seemingly hard to find, when everyday feels like another day to back down and just choose to stop taking on life’s problems, when everything good seems to just slip away within a nanosecond, I think channels of hope are exactly what we need. If uncertainty is our present, why not go back to where we started, from the point where everything sprang forth, which is love— love that can push us further, either to the brink or most of the times, to the apex of something we’ve always wanted to achieve, to acquire and to be with. The “feels” could just be our guide towards feeling love in the right way, within its right terms, within our possible and actual capabilities despite our imperfections as human beings. Love and the “feels”— the two things we need to ponder and invest on in this virtually disintegrating world.

How to Get a Boyfriend: The Literary Way

Are you an NBSB [No Boyfriend Since Birth]?

Have you had a boyfriend but you guys broke up and now you might need a good [and brand new] one?

Do you want to be emotionally attached to someone of the opposite sex?

Well, maybe this one’s for you.

These tips are not my own [but I have inserted some input]. Our very lovely professor in Philippine Literature, whose name I just choose to withhold, with his sheer brilliance in the study of literature, has provided us with these tips that are really essential in this very competitive world of life and love.

Disclaimer: I’ve never [ever] even had a boyfriend too. So maybe this can work for me as well, if given the chance.

Tips to Get a Boyfriend: The Literary Way

1. When he asks you out, ACCEPT IT.

But do PRETEND 101- act like you are dumb/have lower IQ/ less brighter than he is.

Why?

> Because guys like to feel brighter/smarter/have a higher IQ than you.

>Because BOYS ARE OFTEN INTIMIDATED BY SMART GIRLS.

> “Ang feeling ng lalaki, dapat mas intelligent siya kaysa sa’yo. Eh ang totoo do’n, mas bright ka.”

2. When you have done the first step [successfully], and when he is about to be into you, YOU MUST:

>FLIRT WITH ELOQUENCE IN LANGUAGE. Why?

-Conversations (especially the smart, real and intimate ones) tend to be really sexy.

– “The art of seduction does not involve showing off your private parts. Itago mo, leave something to the imagination.”

– FAMILIARITY WITH LANGUAGE. Use your SMART MOUTH. Language is key! Expand your vocabulary; Use the right words at the right time. Never be left in a situation in which you are groping for words. Doing all these will make him very much at ease.

– “The art of seduction begins and ends with the art of language.”

-Get it from the method of The Little Prince. He tamed the wild fox and grew fond of each other eventually.

> Use/ channel your little devilish nature which is charm. Dapat mayroon kang pagkamaldita.

3. YOU HAVE TO BE HIS HABIT. [Like Video Games/Porn/Food or something]

-Be someone who completes him (as a whole) or someone who completes his day

-He shouldn’t be able to live without you [not literally, though]

-Obliges himself constantly to communicate with you.

4. Lay down the TRAP [secretly, in the process]

> When you are his “HABIT”, and you know he’s trapped and all caught up in your spell, SHOW YOUR TRUE COLORS.

CONCLUSION: He won’t be able to let go.

Extra tips:

> Beauty isn’t a necessity.

> All these tips work very well with charm [and it is deceiving].

Well, these are pretty much everything that it is. If you want to get a grip on these tips more, try reading “Dead Stars” by Paz Marquez Benitez. A special character there is the embodiment of these tips [as what my professor said].

I hope this will help you all just as how it will help me or just as how it helped that character in the story.

‘Til the next post!

The November Chronicles: It All Falls on Discretion

Hi. If I’d be given a grade for blogging commitment, it’d be an F. November ended in such a rush, and I was able to post only 2 or 3 [or maybe only 1, if my memory does not fail me] blog posts. With this, I am in deep regret.

Well, being a lazy-ass person that I am, let me narrate to you series of events that happened to me this November [and why it can affect the course of my life for the entire semester’s duration that’s left]

When last month came in, publication work also started pouring in. Research here, research there, research everywhere. “Have a love affair with research”, as what my JRN prof told us, is really true. Being in this career path would really make you dig deep into the dustiest and oldest of books and other forms of written and spoken archives, literally. With all the legwork [too bad it doesn’t really lessen my legs’ cellulite]  I’ve managed and am still managing to go through, thank the heavens I’ve finished one article with my co-writer [who is a really great writer and a blessing from up above]. By now I am still stressed with all the stuff I need to work on in order to finish a prestigious issue [inclusive of legacies] that our team is currently working on.

In other news, our block [because using the collective noun “class” to refer to a collegiate section is way too high school] has been in this mishap which concerns our behavior and other God-knows-what-they-are “shenanigans”. I cannot blame “HER” for being really infuriated because I know that our block has been [really] noisy, but for me there is a fine line between being infuriated “just because” and crossing the line of disciplinary measures. Maybe it is an issue of both anger and noise management. I refuse to disclose any other details about HER, but once again, I cannot blame HER. I am not in the position to do so, and I hold high respects for her.

My block has a problem. A SMALL BUT TERRIBLE PROBLEM. Yes, we may be boisterous, noisy and all the other things associated with loudness and disturbing decibel levels, but we have something to be noisy about [sometimes]. It’s just that, given that the noise with sense is only prevalent SOMETIMES, the rest of the time left are all nonsense noise. This caused our problem. We have caused a so-called and deemed as undeniable “Public Disturbance” and yes, no holds barred, we admit it. But this is not an enough reason to hate us for being who we are just because we are loud and just because one is failing to see the bigger picture.  But being part of the noise’s perpetrators [and it’s controller most of the time], I know in my mind, heart and soul that WE HAVE A PROBLEM, and it is not just HER, or a person, or any other eavesdropper. THE PROBLEM IS US, OURSELVES.

In my opinion, the nonsense noise we have are these 3 F’s: “Fangirling, Feels and Fuck”. With “Fangirling”, I have no problem with it, but controlled fangirling can be done. Excessive fangirling is not good. It is bad for your health if you try to mix it with “unsoundproof” wall partitions and other senseless noise carriers. Second is the “Feels”, and again, I have no problem with it, because I tend to have these too [a lot] but as what I’ve said earlier, excessive feels are not good! The noise from “Feels” are not just from the mouth but is also from chair banging, heavy feet stumping on brittle wood platforms and sound-tripping. Third is the “Fuck” noises. These “Fuck” noises are not noises brought about by having sex within the four corners of a classroom [heavens forbid this from happening]. These noises come from shouting different indecent words in either English or Filipino. The word “Fuck” somehow summarizes all the other profane words given out. And once again, EXCESSIVE “Fucking” is not good! What will the other people from the other side of the judgmental panel think when they hear you shout and speak of profanity almost all day? Yes, I speak these kind of words too but I know when to stop. Given all these “F’s”, maybe it all boils down to a solution God-knows-why it is easier said than done.

It all falls on discretion and sensitivity.

Discretion is not really an equivocal term according to meaning with Sensitivity in this issue [sorry, Logical hungover and all], hence, they work hand-in-hand with each other in order to make things work. If one is sensitive enough to hear and feel that the noise is disturbing other rendezvous happening within the perimeter, then one can send brain signals to one’s mouth or to command others to shut the f*ck up by discretion. That is how it works. We are in the right age to be mature enough to have this kind of skill. This skill is not even complex to start off with!

I insist that I am not an expert on noise and classroom management, and not all my opinions are driven home to be right. I am not in a very influential position to be heard, and the sad thing is that those who are given the chance to be heard just adds fuel to the fire [and increases the panic levels among the people therefore causing more havoc]. I am also part of the noise, we are all one with the noise. But please, we are not in the secondary or even elementary levels to need a clingy adviser to guide us in every step of the way. We are left to supervise ourselves, because in the world after all this college stuff, we will be facing harsher conditions all on our own. It is best to start practicing self-discipline now, before it is too late. Falling prey to the hollow depths of arrogance and ignorance of the rules is the last thing you’d want to do right now that you’re in a tight situation like this. I call for change, we all call for a change, and it is easy to start changing from oneself.

I am drained by all this pedagogue-student and student-student drama. As well as the damn noise.

Pardon me for such a lengthy post. It is with a heavy heart that I start the month of December like this. But I hope you’ll understand.

Hopefully I’d be able to post more good vibes posts sooner or later, given the fact that Christmas is fast approaching.

‘Til the next post. Peace on Earth. xx

Indirect Issues ( A Delayed Post)

Hi.  I really, really failed to post personal chronicles recently, since I am busy working on articles for the publication I work for and other academic stuff. But one thing’s for sure. I did not fail to send at least a few (with a few, linguistically speaking it means a lot) tweets about my day, my tasks, my feelings, and all the shrouds of emotion, food, and whatsoever that I have in mind. Honestly speaking, I am not really sensitive about people’s feelings towards me or towards the way I act or the way I do with my daily life. In any way I put it, I don’t really feel if people can’t stand to put up with my online shenanigans, thus I am heading towards the real point of this post. Micro-blogging is a whole new world in itself, as it provided new horizons for people to share whatever goes into their mind which are basically are of human interest and/or most of the time just nonsense banter, whines and rants about cravings, schoolwork and other stuff. Personally, I am a huge fan of micro-blogging sites, particularly Twitter, and if you go see my twitter feed, you will really see a handful of nonsense and sometimes rational tweets.

Well, I believe that owning a micro-blogging and/or social networking account is like Burger King’s “Have It Your Way”, it’s just that we are entitled with responsibilities and limits. We have followers, these people read up whatever their eyes set sight on in their lapse times scrolling through their feed, and if they don’t like something, they just skip it and not give a fuss [can I use f*ck?] about it. But in some cases, things are different, because not all followers don’t give a f*ck about the nonsense that you post, they actually make a big deal out of it, and attacks (or even bombards) you with “indirects”.  Well, it can hurt you in a way you can’t control if you care about it, but it’s nothing if you take it for granted.

Well, to keep this post short,  I want to give some unsolicited advice to all “Indirectioners” out there, just press the unfollow or the unlike button if you don’t like what you’re seeing on your feeds. It will do you a huge favor. xx

Worth the Weight

Hi. 

So I have not posted a personal chronicle recently, and I thought of the need to prompt myself to talk about something way too close to my heart. In case you’re wondering, this post is titled “Worth the Weight” because I realized that I should love myself for my weight, my size and my external attributes, even though often times I am let down by it.

To start off with, have you ever felt that:

– When you enter a clothing store and you feel bad because nothing will fit to you and your body type.

-When you wear something out of your normal outfit, (say for me, when I wear sleeveless blouses) you tend to really feel fat and ugly and miserable or simply crappy about yourself.

-When you see people eyeing you for being your size.

-When people compare you to a pig or any other gargantuan organism that exists here on Earth.

-You continually promise yourself to follow a fitness regimen and after a jog or one aero session, you just quit and get it over with.

-And many other factors that I am too lazy to enumerate [or I just ran out of ideas]

If in all these factors, your reactions were: “I get that a lot!”, “Omg!”, “I can so relate to this!”, “H*ly Sh*t! I get that all the time!” and many other reactions, well, I tell you, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

Just this afternoon I received a gift from my cousin, a chambray shirt [that I was yearning for almost months now]. I got so ecstatic when I opened the package, and when I decided to put it on, I immediately felt down, like “depressed” kind of down, because it didn’t fit me. I looked like a rice cake [tightly] wrapped in banana leaves. The shirt was great, there’s no doubt about it, but I figured out that something was wrong, and I thought that the wrong thing was me. Me as a [fat] person, me as to having a big frame, me as to being too fat for my age.

Instances like these prompt me to really feel bad, both physically and emotionally, and my brain sends signals that prevent me to feel completely confident and carefree.

The image of beauty has been warped by many factors brought about by time, the media (I shall talk about this when we’ve discussed this on Comm Theory class), technology and the total advancements that humanity has achieved. If I’m not mistaken, in the medieval ages, fat women were considered the beautiful women (go figure!) but as the centuries go by, royals and colonial masters have come and go, and people’s outlook as to what was beautiful drastically changed. This makes me sad and disappointed as to how society molded itself.

Even the supreme matter of the heart, which is LOVE, has been associated to cling towards a keen consideration as to the size of your partner, as to whether you two look proportional with each other, if you two, when seen together, won’t look like the number 10, and all other sorts of things you should consider in order to look pleasing to the general (or can I say generally judgmental) public.

Now, given the advantages freedom of speech has to offer, I stand up against feeling bad about my weight, about my body type, and about every single physical attribute that society deems as “ugly”. What can I do if this is what the heavens [as of the moment] has blessed me with? What can I do if my taste buds are really wild and they want to ingest everything along their path? What can I do if [insert various circumstances that can affect your physicality here]? See, we are partially defenseless, but we are not left without a choice.

As President Obama said: “Yes We Can!” do the following:

-Exercise in any way we can, as long as we sweat and burn some calories on a regular basis.

-Eat right, or if you can’t chew greens and other lame and boring models’ food, you can choose to reduce your daily calorie intake by downgrading fast food and cholesterol-rich food intake.

-I found this at somewhere associated with Tyra Banks (so it’s either on TV or from the net), that you can look at what you think is the best part of your body and lovingly look at it. Yes, it can be time-consuming, I know, but at least you’ll feel really great about yourself. Just don’t overdo it, because there is a fine line between loving yourself and being vain.

– If someone tells you, or wants to convey to you that they will like or love you when you are slimmer or when you change this or that, leave them, or prove them wrong (it’s up to you), because they are the kinds of people who are narrow-minded and heartless (if you want to put it that way). #hugot

-Refrain from stepping on the weighing scale and measuring your vital stats with a measuring tape. They are some of society’s tools to let you down. But if you’re doing a fitness regimen, then they can help you with your immediate gratification issues.

-Buy a “lying mirror” wherein it tones down your size and you feel beautiful whenever you stare at it. (We have to be Snow White’s evil mother some times.)

And lastly,

– YOU ARE YOUR BODY’S CAPTAIN. Enhance what you think is the best thing about you, physical or not. Be able to do some changes, if you deem them necessary. Protect your body, de-stress from this crazy biosphere we are all in and LOVE YOURSELF UNCONDITIONALLY.

Well, I am no Oprah, Tyra or Dr. Phil, but I tell you this because I am speaking from experience. I am actually feeling down recently, and this is one way I found in which I can “empower myself” and hopefully, you might as well do so, too.

Here is my evolution: (Haven’t I told you that I was a Pokemon?)

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(Me, circa 1999)

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(Me, circa 2002-2003)

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(Me, circa 2005 and it’s framed lol)

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(Me, circa 2010)

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(Me, circa 2011)

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(Look at me now lol!!)

Later on in my life, I have found out that I can’t do anything to drastically reduce my weight. Instead, what I did was I found out methods to partially hide my real frame and feel confident at least every once in a while.

And a plot twist! My cousin, who sent me a chambray shirt just this afternoon, came to my house and bought me a bigger one.

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[New chambray asdfghjkl I can’t contain my happiness, so I took a selfie!]

So if you’re down or if you’re feeling like you’re a bunch of crap (I get that a lot!), always remember, “the only permanent thing in this world is change.” ‘Til the next post! xx

#YolandaPH and The Unwavering Filipino Resiliency

“The World’s Strongest Typhoon of 2013”

“Super Typhoon”

“Deadliest”, “Strongest”

Those are some of the many attributes the media and the people knew off Typhoon “Haiyan”, or locally, Typhoon Yolanda.

I think if Yolanda was a person, she would be the embodiment of “femme fatale”.

But anyways, have me speak of Yolanda’s meteorological attributes.

(DISCLAIMER: Since I’m no good at writing meteorological stuff, and there are too many facts to write down, those are just some of the things I think one should know.)

According to reports made by the Philippine Atmospheric, Geophysical and Astronomical Services Administration (PAGASA) parts of Eastern Visayas, South Luzon, Northern Mindanao are severely affected by 250 KPH winds. Metro Manila was also partly affected.

The places that were devastated by the typhoon were Tacloban, Leyte, parts of Masbate, Surigao, Aklan, and many others. Even the places struck by the October 15 earthquake, namely Bohol and Cebu, were not spared.

And here is a really heart-warming picture from CNN (I grabbed it from Facebook):

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The Unwavering Filipino Resiliency

Having been born and raised in a country wherein typhoons and severe floodings are the status quo, I can really say that my nation is a resilient nation that faces problems and various consequences with hope, courage and the ever-powerful weapon–SMILE. Some take it on a negative note that we lack the seriousness to face the problems we encounter, and that we keep on joking around at the most inappropriate of times. What they don’t understand is that it is our way to alleviate the pain brought about by the problems we face, and it is one of the tools that help us get over with things.

Thus, I end this post with an empowering remark for the victims of the Zamboanga conflict, October 15 Earthquake, and Super Typhoon Yolanda: “The Filipino Spirit is Unbreakable.”

Logical Hangover

Hi.

So yesterday was the first day of classes for the second semester, and I would like to talk about not the entirety of my day but just the one hour that really stood out, my logic class.

So our professor started off by saying: “Magdasal tayo na kunwari Kristiyano tayo.” (Let’s pretend to pray like Christians.)

That statement gave us a thirst of thought.

Moving on, he had many jokes and what I refer to as “trick questions” when he gave us an overview on how to make sound logical reasons and how to distinguish if an argument is true/false, illogical or otherwise.

Here is one joke that really sold us into bursting into laughter:

“Anong pangalan ng anak ni Superman at ni Supergirl? Superboy.” (What is the name of Superman and Supergirl’s child? Superboy.)

“Eh ano namang pangalan ng anak ni Batman at ni Catwoman? BaCat?” (What is the name of Batman and Catwoman’s child? BaCat [ a Filipino word which indicates that a certain body part is seen even through the surface of his/her clothes]) <This one was the real outtake of the class.

But , being the good logic guy that he is, he followed, “Hindi. Ang pangalan ng anak ni  Batman at Catwoman ay Ricky.”

We all asked why. Then he said: “Anong paki niyo kung Ricky and pangalan ng anak nila?”  (Who cares if they named their son Ricky?)

And here was the logical (but tricky) argument he gave us to ponder about:

“No unclever is not non-stupid.” <This stresses me out I find it very hard to ponder about it.

Well, let me get to the point of why I really wrote this post.

A well-known writer once told his audience at a conference that: “You should write what you live by.”

You should be the embodiment of whatever you write, especially when it’s made for public view.

Given the logical relevance of this, I think that whenever you teach someone, give advice to someone or even when you just share your point of view to someone, you should make sure that you “practice what you preach”, because it adds credibility and integrity to whatever you pen or whatever goes out of your mouth that is given an audible perception.

Given the power of the pen and the thrusting capacity of words from one’s mouth, if one wrongly says or writes something, it is a “one miss you die” chance because of the social effect mileage it can go which can influence people to believe it without you even embodying it. It is an understated [or maybe not] form of hypocrisy, if one puts it that way. 

Well, I guess I just segued the real point of this post from what you thought I was supposed to talk about. I can’t talk about logic, because I’m no good at it [as of the moment], but hopefully, I can learn it as time passes.

I might [slim chances of possibility, as my English class thought me] post some of the manuscripts I’ll pass for a literary folio that I work for, but as of now, I simply can’t tell whether I can make up my mind to so or otherwise. ‘Til the next post. xx